w.atching the w.orld unw.ind

Today's lyric:
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"I don't mind about people's fears
Authority no longer hears
Send a social engineer
And I don't mind at all."

Bob Geldof: "The Great Song of Indifference"
From the album: "The Vegetarians of Love"

Apparently - weather-wise - there's a sky full of skunksh1t headed our way this weekend.

A good excuse to open a(nother) bottle of red and feet up?

Enjoy yours, y'all..

Labels: Climatology

Today's lyric:
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"The biggest wheels of industry
Retire sharp and short
And the after dinner overtures
Are nothing but an after thought
Somebody's creeping in the kitchen
There's a reputation to be made
Whose nerves are always on a knife's edge
Who's up late polishing the blade."

Elvis Costello: "Man out of time"
From the album: "The Very Best Of"

Dave was coming to the end of a successful interview with a new employer when the boss said "So, tell me something about yourself that has nothing to do with your job application."
Dave thought for a moment, then said "I know pretty much everyone in the world?"
"Oh come on" said the boss. "I'm just about to offer you the job and you come up with rubbish like that?"
"No" said Dave. "Name someone and I'll know them."
"Ok - Tom Cruise" said the boss.
"Yep, known him for years" replied Dave.
"Right" said the boss, knowing how to call his bluff. "I'm just about to fly to L.A. on a business trip. How about you come with me, we'll just knock on Mr Cruise's door and we'll prove you're lying?"
So they did, and when they rang the bell, Tom himself answered the door and screamed "Dave! Is it really you? I can't believe it, after all these years you've finally accepted my invitation to come here."
And they all spent a pleasant afternoon at the mansion.

"Ok" said the boss when they left. "That may have been a fluke, me choosing Tom Cruise. How many presidents of the USA do you know, then?"
"Which Bush do you want to meet?" asked Dave.
"Senior" said the boss, calling his tune.
"Yep, he played golf with my grandad" said Dave. "He was always round our house."

So they knocked on the door of President Bush Snr and were greeted with "My God, we were just talking about playing golf with your grandad, Dave. Come in and have a drink with us."
And they all spent a pleasant afternoon at the Bush's home.

But still the boss wasn't totally convinced.
"What about the Pope?" he asked Dave.
"Well, I can't guarantee to get you into the Vatican, security's pretty tight these days. But yes, we're good mates."

So they fly to Rome and Dave leaves the boss in St Peter's Square while he nips round the back of the Vatican.
A few minutes later, Dave and the Pope appear on the balcony, arms draped round each other and the Pope dispensing papal blessings with his free right hand. The crowd go wild.

When Dave gets back to where he left his boss, the poor man's fainted and is being brought round with smelling salts.

"That impressed, eh?" smirked Dave.

"Well" said the boss eventually. "It wasn't that you knew the Pope, but when you came out onto the balcony, the bloke next to me asked "Who's the guy with the pointy hat with his arm draped round Dave?"

Labels: Laughage

Today's lyric:
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"We'd sing in gay abandon then
We'd get it wrong and try again
As here we brood with doubts assailed
Nothing ventured, nothing failed."

Ian Dury & The Blockheads: "The Passing Show"
From the album: "Mr Lovepants"

800th post. Who'da thunk it?

Anyway, the perfect registration plate for us creative writers:

BL05 GER

Ithangyew.

Labels: Rubbish

Today's lyric:
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"Nothing I can do could ever bring those feelings back
I've taken everything - my body is a bloated sack
The days behind me start rolling into months
Is time running out?
My head feels too heavy
My legs feel too weak
All I can do now is sleep."

The Bluetones: "Time and again"
From the album: "Expecting to fly"

Well, a week of d.i.y. is hardly inspirational, is it?

So back to work for a rest and lo! nothing seems to have changed during the ten days I was away?

Same desk, faces, atmos...

I'll be perked back up by this time tomorrow, promise.

Labels: Returnage

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"You're dead but the world keeps spinning
Take a spin through the world you left
It's getting dark a little too early
Are you missing the dearly bereft?"

Eels: "Last stop: This town"
From the album: "Electro-Shock Blues"

Off for a week to finish off some dragging-on-for-far-too-long diy.

So apropos of absolutely nothing at all, a bawdy old Army song for yer.

Enjoy your weekends, y'all..

Asshole, asshole
A soldier I will be
To piss, to piss
Two pistols by my side
To fight for the old cnut, fight for the old cnut
Fight for the old countreeeee
To fight for the old country.

Anon.

Labels: Furloughage

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"I'll read a story if it helps you sleep at night.
I've got some matches if you ever need a light.
Oh I am just a man
but I am doing what I can to help you."

Pulp: "Dishes"
From the album: "This is hardcore"

When my train pulled in this morning - albeit a different service - I should have sensed something was amiss..

It was apparently a delayed-by-one-hour service and when we arrived south of Penge West (somewhere I'd only ever seen fly by at 90mph - we shuddered to a stop. The driver announced that either a door was open or someone had pulled the emergency cord and he'd have to investigate. A nanosecond later, off we set again. Quick solution there, then?

A hundred yards further up the track, another shuddering stop.

"Guess what, ladies and gentlemen?" he intoned. "Now the emergency brake's come on!"

At which point, the demure young woman opposite me muttered "A problem shared.."

And we laughed.

Labels: Commutage

Today's lyric:
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"When I first met you girl you didn't have no shoes
Now you're walking 'round like you're front page news
You've been awful careful 'bout the friends you choose
But you won't find my name in your book of Who's Who?"

The Sex Pistols: "(I'm not your) Stepping stone"
From the album: "Kiss this"

four-piece band I've ever seen, but it's been my life-long ambition to see these fine (and now decrepit) gentlemen and nothing - not bum notes or a 15+ stone, 40+ year old pi55ed pogoer who careened off anyone in his whirling world - was gonna stop me enjoying the gig. Hope his ribs hurt this morning - they ought to, with a few well-aimed elbows cracking into his slats.

The lads did the full set and if I can Ph0t0sh0p anything worthwhile out of Mrs.D's camera (easier to smuggle in than mine) there will be pix soon. Ok NiC?

And yes, McLaren, you are a fcuking w@nker!

Anarchy in the UK? Bring it on, son, bring it on..

Labels: Sex Pistolage

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"The night time comes and the streets they ring
With the fears of a thousand things
But if you worry about your ports of call
You'll never get nothing done at all."

The Stranglers: "5 minutes"
From the album: "V"

At the military Remembrance service that I attended yesterday*, the start of the two minutes' silence was announced by musket fire. This was followed a nanosecond later by the City's own guns inviting silence across the island.

When the City's guns declared the silence over, there was no equivalent cessation from the muskets, so everyone stood (in the cold and drizzle) for several minutes, until someone could bear it no longer and found the switch for the taped "Last Post" music to break the deadlock. At which several wheel-chair bound vets sat down with very obvious relief.

But it was a moving event notwithstanding, and I was pleased to have made the effort to attend.

* If I tell you, Buddy and I will have to kill you.

Labels: Remembrance

Today's lyric:
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"So what the hell you're doing here
Filling the space between my ears
Why don't you all just disappear
With all your friends just way too dear
You are foaming at the mouth
You are mad without a doubt
Cos I'm really freaking out."

Graham Coxon: "Freakin' out"
From the album: "Happiness in magazines"

So in this health and safety conscious, nanny-state controlled world of ours, should there be (or is there already?) a little country where anyone can go and basically do whatever they wanted, as long as it didn't harm or interfere with anyone else?

So if you wanted to hurtle around on a motorbike without a crash-helmet, or bungee jump without a safety net, there'd be no-one to 'warn you off'

If you broke a leg and died in agony, tough luck.

If you contracted an illness and were too sick to get up to eat or drink, tough luck.

That sort of thing.

Anyway, enjoy your weekends, y'all.

Labels: Ramblings

Today's lyric:
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"Feel the motion, it's an endless ocean
Rocking gently and moving deeply
Feels like always being knocked sideways
Over and over by the strength of your love."

The Finn Brothers: "Luckiest Man Alive"
From the album: "Everyone is here"

The best of 225 shots! If anyone can give me pointers on how to get better fireworks shots using a reasonably decent digital camera..?

Labels: Fireworkage

Today's lyric:
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"Unfair to give in - and never change its course
If you have the choice before you
You must take it with a force

Or the past will take you - keep you from the truth
As bitterness rises - from the ashes of your youth."

Paul Weller: "Bitterness rising"
From the album: "Paul Weller"

Number One Daughter, her New Man and several of her lovely-in-every-sense-of-the-word girlfriends accompanied us to the village's public fireworks display last night, in which I rattled off probably hundreds of shots in the (probably vain) hope of getting one in-focus photo.

As we repaired back to ours for a glass of warming rosso or several, there was no time to download and purge, so maybe tonight?

But we all reflected that it wasn't that long ago that the result would have been to wait for a week after delivering the (wet) film to Boots or whoever, then get 35 fuzzy and/or mis-aligned shots which went straight into the bin and maybe one that was album-worthy?

Whereas now there's a good chance that some of the efforts will be of adequate quality (if not calibre) to blow up to an A4 print and move randomly around the walls when bored.

We shall see (literally)

Labels: Guy Fawkesage

Today's lyric:
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"The Sweeney's doing ninety 'cause they've got the word to go.
They get a gang of villains in a shed out by Heathrow
They're countin' out the fivers when the handcuffs lock again
In and out o Wandsworth with the numbers on their names
It's funny how their misses always look the bleedin' same.
And meanwhile, at the station, there's a couple a likely lads,
Who swear like how's-your-father and they're very cool for cats.
They're cool for cats.."

Squeeze: "Cool for cats"
From the album: "Big Squeeze"

that these little feckers are a year old today?

Happy Guy Fawkes Night, Amstel and Noodle!

Labels: Kittenage

Today's lyric:
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"I never made promises lightly
And there have been some that I've broken
But I swear in the days still left
We'll walk in fields of gold."

Sting: "Fields of gold"
From the album: "albumname"

No, don't worry Buddy, I'm not diving without you, but lately I've been mooching about here.* (worksafe)

Colleagues in the office have been 'borrowing' several of my pix for monitor wallpaper and suggesting I should put them up for sale.

While I'm pleased with the results of some of my photography, I've never considered it as being commercially valuable, but within minutes of posting up some examples of my ouevre, I had several nice compliments.

So we'll see if the "nice shot" comments turn into actual filthy lucre?

Have a great weekend, y'all.

* In redbubble, my monicker is MisterD.

Labels: photographage